Boeing Announces New 797 to Replace the 737 Family

April Fools, Boeing

After more than 50 years, Boeing has finally announced plans to cancel the Boeing 737 program. The company is going to launch the new and long-awaited 797 aircraft to replace the 737. In a real surprise, the company says development work has been quietly underway for some time, and the aircraft should be certified relatively quickly.

Boeing has had a challenging two decades, and the downhill slide has yet to be arrested. It’s hard to know where to start this saga, so let’s start in late 2018 when the Lion Air 737 MAX crashed shortly after takeoff. Boeing blamed the pilots for the accident, and it continued to do so after an Ethiopian MAX met the same fate in March of 2019. Only later did it become apparent that the faulty design of the Maneuvering Characteristics Augmentation System (MCAS) system was at fault.

The MCAS and the Stretched 737

The MCAS was created specifically because the MAX was yet another stretch of the long-tortured 737. More than fifty years ago, the first 737-100 rolled off the line. CEO Bill Allen had launched the airplane because of his triskaphobia which prevented him from ever flying on the three-engined 727. Since that time, Boeing improved performance by stretching the aircraft and adding new, more efficient engines multiple times.

The next version, the Classic series (-300/400/500), had to have a flat-bottom nacelle since the diameter of the CFM high-bypass engines was significantly larger than the original Pratt engines. Boeing engineers had designed the airplane very low to the ground, because the so-called “Great Stair Shortage of 1965” had required rationing of air stairs. The new design worked wonders, but once the shortage passed and new engines were developed, they wouldn’t fit without that modification.

By the time the so-called Next Generation (NG) aircraft were built (-600/700/800/900), the newer and again larger-diameter engines required the gear to be jacked up so the airplane would sit higher. And when the MAX was designed, it needed more clearance for even bigger engines, so the engines were pushed forward and up in front of the wing, creating a problem with the center of gravity. MCAS was designed to quietly fix that problem, but instead, it caused two horrible accidents. The airplane was grounded worldwide by regulators who had been publicly embarrassed for allowing the airplane to fly as designed.

This set the stage for a tenuous relationship between Boeing, its suppliers, the public, and the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA).

Digging a Deeper Hole

Though the MAX is once again flying, it has not been smooth sailing. We all know about the plug door flying off Alaska 1282 due to poor workmanship. Management’s arrogance and continued failure to fix the company led the government to take drastic action. It has refused to certify the MAX 7 and MAX 10 variants until minor defects are fixed. It has also prevented Boeing from increasing production rates of the MAX, frustrating every airline that is desperately waiting for Boeing to live up to its promises.

Increasingly boxed into a corner, Boeing has finally made the long overdue decision to stop producing the MAX. Instead it has unveiled the 797 to carry the company’s flag as its premier narrowbody offering.

The Boeing 797

The airplane is touted as being a gamechanger.

The 797 delivers enhanced efficiency, improved environmental performance and increased passenger comfort to the single-aisle market. Incorporating advanced technology winglets and efficient engines, the 797 offers excellent economics, reducing fuel use and emissions by 20 percent over the NG while producing a 50 percent smaller noise footprint. Additionally, the 797 offers up to 14 percent lower airframe maintenance costs than the competition. Passengers will enjoy the Boeing Sky Interior, highlighted by modern sculpted sidewalls and window reveals, LED lighting that enhances the sense of spaciousness and larger pivoting overhead storage bins.

If this sounds impressive, it is. And just take a look at this revolutionary design.

CEO Dave Calhoun — who remains in his role until his well-earned retirement at the end of 2024 — had this to say about the 797.

Boeing has long been known for producing the best aircraft in the world. We’ve had some hiccups in dealing with the FAA on the 737 MAX, so we knew that only a cleansheet design would help repair that trust. Now, the 797 will shepherd us into the future as we say farewell to the 737.

How can the FAA not certify the airplane? The 797 has had no design or manufacturing issues. Not a single quality has escaped. With a record this perfect, the 797 should now be able to sail through the process.

Many airlines are excited to switch their orders to this aircraft despite the 15 percent increase in price over the MAX.

Southwest CEO Bob Jordan said, “we’d be happy to pay 50 percent more to get our hands on an airplane that Boeing can actually deliver. The 797-7 looks like a winner.”

United CEO Scott Kirby — known as one of the sharpest minds in the industry — had a different view. “Wait, isn’t that just a 737 with a different name painted on the side? Do they really think the FAA will fall for this? Oh, actually, nevermind. Not a bad idea. But I’m not paying 15 percent more for that.”

An anonymous Boeing employee who was not authorized to speak explained that the 15 percent price increase was essential. “Do you know how many places we’ve written 737 and MAX around the factory and in marketing materials? It’s not cheap to change that to say 797, er, I mean, develop a brand new airplane.”

The aircraft is expected to be certified this year with entry into service sometime in 2045.

And Happy April Fools’ Day to all!

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52 comments on “Boeing Announces New 797 to Replace the 737 Family

  1. There are millions of Boeing stakeholders, from employees to customers to passengers, who wish this was actually the case. Possibly your best work in this series!

      1. It speaks volumes that “the aircraft should be certified relatively quickly” at the end of the first paragraph was an even bigger tell than the actual “April Fools” tag directly beneath the headline!

        Brett, maybe you should leave that tag off until later in the day or the following day so we can see how many more fish you reel in! Truly exceptional work; the reality and the parody were interspersed so seamlessly. Loved the exec “quotes” too!

    1. This is a good one !! You almost had me believing this. Until at the end when it said. April Fools !!

  2. This of course is PR damage control 101– deflect from bad press with a shiny new product.

    Im sure all eyes are on Southwest though, which was a big motivator for keeping the 737 in service for so long…

  3. ” CEO Bill Allen had launched the airplane because of his triskaphobia which prevented him from ever flying on the three-engined 727.” First big laugh.

    This also struck me funny “The next version, the Classic series (-300/400/500), had to have a flat-bottom nacelle since the diameter of the CFM high-bypass engines was significantly larger than the original Pratt engines. Boeing engineers had designed the airplane very low to the ground, because the so-called “Great Stair Shortage of 1965” had required rationing of air stairs. The new design worked wonders, but once the shortage passed and new engines were developed, they wouldn’t fit without that modification.”

    You perfectly blended the possible with the absurd, nice going.

    1. Same here. If Boeing ever does choose to replace the 737, they will have to do a lot of convincing to keep people from thinking it’s not just a joke, and even then many people (myself included) still won’t really believe believe Boeing until the first 737 replacements enter commercial revenue service.

      The 737 and its derivatives have been flying commercially for 56 years. Given the ~30 year lifespan of most new commercial passenger planes, there’s a very good chance that 737s will reach a milestone of 100 years of commercial service, barring a Boeing bankruptcy or some type of major black swan event.

      1. Putting it that way, it would be like if major airlines were still flying the DC-3 today (service launched in 1936). Your observation is both amazing, and depressing!

  4. Cranky- Well, you had me too… But I don’t hate, I love. Well-played sir, well-played!!!

  5. I love the “Great Staircase Shortage” and “Not a single quality has escaped.” (I really thought John Oliver’s head was going to explode when he got to that part.)

    But I spotted it as an April Fools’ joke pretty quickly, as Boeing will never give up on the 737 until they literally have no choice. 737-WARP models will be carrying freight and colonists to the outer planets of the Federation centuries from now (or to Hoth if you prefer that universe.)

    Speaking of Oliver’s story on Boeing, I was disappointed by one thing: he pointed out the mentality change after Boeing and McDonnell-Douglas merged, and the problems with the DC-10, but not that, prior to the merger with McDonnell, Douglas had a good reputation for quality too.

    1. CraigTPA – It’s true about Douglas, but that was SO long ago it’s ancient irrelevant history now. Douglas made high quality planes that lasted forever, and they were impressively innovative. That innovation died the day McDonnell took over. A new airplane was never built again.
      (Technically, the DC-10 came out post-merger, but it’s development began under Douglas.)

      1. Wasn’t the C-17 the only clean sheet product from MD? All the rest were I progress at the time of the merger

        1. The F/A-18 family, albeit the starting point was the Northrup F-17. And there was the redesign of the Harrier into the AV-8B

  6. Great article showcasing the dumbest decision Boeing ever made.

    They will be paying for this one for decades!

  7. Why not, it could be the real solution to 737 drama, they might have a real shot at it, wait n see.

    1. Some of us would love to see a new version of the 757 roll into market. Why they stopped production of the 757, we would never know!

  8. The following was rejected for being far too close to reality for comfort:

    “Boeing adopts base 16 to launch Boeing 737 MAX B, MAX C, MAX D, redesignates MAX10 as MAX A.”

    We decided to take a leaf from our Microsoft neighbors and will now use hexadecimal notation for our aircraft models, to emphasize how high-techy we are and all. This way we can launch even more 737 derivatives. The 100th anniversary of the 737 is less than 45 years away. We figure if the B-52 can make it, so can the 737. Mark your calendar now for the gala event – make reservations today!

    Boeing’s far more likely to lean into this than away, unfortunately.

  9. As a 737 hater, I really wish Boeing would have actually done this in the late 2000’s. The MAX has really bitten them in the butt.

    I really hope Boeing can become the company it once was.

  10. They don’t need the 797, they just need to move the headquarters again, to someplace even further away from Seattle than DC. That’ll fix everything.

  11. I thought I was right on that the 797 is 737 replacement and not the MOM small twin aisle aircraft.

  12. You got me good. I was struggling with how Boeing hasn’t put out a plane that didn’t have vast problems since the 773 yet were going to suddenly put out a functional well-designed aircraft on pretty short notice.

  13. I believed everything entirery. Didn’t I hear your news story somewhere on actual news radio? Are you paying media to get stuff aired? Please, no!!

    Anyway, wishiing you many more fun posts.

  14. Since Day 1 when the 737 Max was launched, Boeing knew the plane was faulty as it was not designed for the new fuel efficient engines. Boeing chose to keep quiet and not inform their airline customers, let alone to train the pilots how to use the new software.

    The defect caused 2 Max planes to crash, and hundreds of innocent lives lost. No one at Boeing was personally held responsible. Boeing was only slapped with a fine.

    Also the FAA approved these defective planes. Why wasn’t the FAA held responsible for the crashes?

    All these so easily forgotten with the announcement of the new plane replacement for the 737.

  15. “well-earned retirement” = Calhoun. Anybody who didn’t think unbelievable stupidity, needs to consider their own competency.

  16. I think I would have ended the article with a more subtle reference to April Fools…

    “…The aircraft is expected to be certified this year with entry into service on April 1, 2025.”

  17. That was hilarious! The 797 might actually be needed after Boeing trashed the reputation of the 737!!! Maybe the article could have made mention of the “ups and downs” of the airline industry!

  18. ..had me going till i read ‘should be quickly approved’, ‘well earned retirement’ and saw the pic which looked same ole,same ole. Considering the losses, this may have been in bad form.

  19. Peel back the 797 speaker to see the old 737 sticker. This is a rebranding not a redesign.

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