Screw It – Let’s Lighten Things Up with the Playmobil Security Checkpoint

It’s been a heck of a week. Nice of Frontier to cap it off with a Chapter 11 filing last night, huh? I’m a little nervous about this one. They say they filed because the credit card processor increased the holdback significantly. It’s no surprise. With all these other airlines going under, the credit card guys are getting nervous that they’ll be left holding the bag again, so they want more of a cushion. Meanwhile, that means Frontier had to throw together a bankruptcy filing and now hope they can find Debtor-in-Possession (DIP). If they can, then they’ll reorganize. If they can’t, well, they’ll join the rest of the guys in the graveyard. For now, nothing changes while they sort things out. We’ll see what happens.

So I say let’s forget this crap for now. I’m ending the week on a lighter note. I’m very sad to report that the Playmobil Security Checkpoint is no longer available on Amazon. This is a bummer, because it provided some pretty impressive inspiration for the 47 customer reviews. These are definitely worth a read.

Some of the highlights . . .

“I was a little disappointed when I first bought this item, because the functionality is limited. My 5 year old son pointed out that the passenger’s shoes cannot be removed. Then, we placed a deadly fingernail file underneath the passenger’s scarf, and neither the detector doorway nor the security wand picked it up.”

“I especially appreciated the enclosed signed photo of Michael Chertoff and his letter explaining how necessary it is to start educating today’s youth early with toys like these, especially as their elders just don’t seem to be taking the whole thing seriously”

“I applaud Playmobile for attempting to provide us with the tools we need to teach our children to unquestioningly obey the commands of the State Security Apparatus, but unfortunately, this product falls short of doing that. There’s no brown figure for little Josh to profile, taser, and detain? Where are all the frightened plastic Heartlanders pointing at the brown figure as they whisper “terrorist?” Where are the hippy couple figures being denied boarding passes? And shouldn’t someone be forcing a mother figure to drink her own breast milk?”

“Unfortunately, this toy comes short in a few areas:
1) It does not show that if you’re rich, you don’t have to wait in line for hours. If you can travel first class, you get your own fast-track screening. Too bad the terr’ists have plenty of Saudi and Pakistani cash and can easily travel first class should they want to. They should have included another screening set in the box.
2) It does not come with the 300 tired-looking playmobils you would need to show the passengers waiting in line behind the screening area. “

“I wish this toy had been around when I was a child so that we might have learned important life lessons rather than the fluffy sugar-coated false utopia of Rainbow Bright and Friends.”

Come to think of it, this may not really be much of a lighter note after all. Ugh. I’m taking the weekend off this week. See you back here on Monday.